Post by El Matto Acido on Oct 28, 2016 7:16:45 GMT
The scene opens on the outskirts of Mexico City, our friendly neighborhood Matador is seen standing behind a large wooden circle. His old friend The Psycho Kid approaches him from behind, and looks at the empty ring."Whatcha doin Matt?" The Psychotic Super...manager said, a look of confusion on his face.
El Matador: Waiting, going to get a bit of last minute training in with Schmidt.
TPK: Wait, you don't mean....hahaha you actually went and bought a bull? That's freakin' awesome!
El Matador: Yeah, he's been hanging with Grin and I in Portland for the last week or so. He's mellowed out a bit, could be he's high as fuck ninety percent of the time but hey....who knows, maybe he just likes me.
A moment or so later, a large black and white spotted bull can be seen, being lead towards the enclosure. Schmidt kicks, and scrapes, tossing his head from side to side in an act of resilience. One of the handlers catches the top of Schmidt's head to the bridge of his nose, knocking him unconscious. Matador approaches, and motions for the ring, Schmidt simply nods, and walks in unassisted.
TPK: Well, he certainly seems to have no problems listening to you, which is odd. Totally thought bulls hated matadors.
El Matador: Probably because I'm not constantly riding, or stabbing at him with sharp objects. We hang out, watch Netflix, smoke weed, eat food, and generally chill. What the hell isn't to like?
TPK: Yeah, about that. Been meaning to mention this, but The Outliers seem to be rubbing off on you. NOT that I'm complaining. Think it's pretty kick ass you've got friends.
El Matador: They are pretty awesome fellas, I love hanging with them. Also fun as hell being in a ring with them, even though it's only happened just the once. Hell, things go well this time, you're looking at one third of the Trios Champions. Imagine the surprise that'd befall GoL if that happened.
Matador enters the circle, and closes the door behind him. Schmidt simply stares him down. Jokingly, Matador stamps his feet, and lowers his head, causing Schmidt to mirror his actions. The two charge headlong towards one another, and just as it seems as The Dude is about to have one hell of a headache, they both stop, and Matador simply pats his head, and pulls an apple out of his pocket. Matador feeds the snack to his literal beast of a friend, and chuckles slightly. The duo train for hours, and once darkness falls, Matt decides to call it a day.
Matador: Now Schmidt, be a good dude, listen to these two. They just want to escort you back to your pen. I'll see you at the show, dude.
TPK had already left at this point, and it wasn't a bad night out, so Matador decided to make the short trek back to the city. About half way a fancy red car comes from seemingly nowhere. Inside are three of the most beautiful women you'd ever laid eyes on. The car sounds it's horn, getting Matador's attention.
Matador: Can I help you ladies?
Driver: Actually, we wanted to help you. It's getting late. why don't you hop in? We could go to the city...just the three of us. I'm "sure" we could find something to occupy us for the evening.
Passenger 1: Yeah, what do you say handsome? We're very lonely, please get in.
Passenger 2: We've got sushi in here, I hope you don't mind it's from a dirty old truck stop. Only problem is...we don't have anyone to share it with. Why, what ever will we do?
The driver strokes the blood red interior of the car, and motions her head ever so slightly towards the passenger side seat suggestively. Matador cocks an eyebrow under his mask, this whole situation seemed bizarre even by his standards. Generally he'd get in, no questions asked, but something deep inside of him screamed walk away.
Matador: Yeah, think I'm going to pass. Thanks, but I'm almost to my room. You senoritas have a good evening, besides my wife would kill us all if anything happened.
The driver starts to speak again, but Matador simply walks away into the distance. The next morning, Space Case is sitting down to breakfast with TPK. He recaps the events of the evening, and a loud crashing noise is heard. The waitress, a frightened look on her face, had dropped a giant plate of Juevos Rancheros. The woman rushes toward the table.
Waitress: Y...you saw el carro de las brujas!? You are a very lucky man, senior. Had you gotten in that car, they would be finding your body days later, drained of blood, symbols carved into your flesh. They say, that the temptation is so great, no man can refuse...but you refused. They are supposed to know your desires, and use them to entice you.
Matador: Thing of it is, I've got damn near anything I could want already. Though I did think it was odd, them offering me sushi...hell of a thing to find in Mexico. But, they certainly tried. Only thing I want right now, they couldn't even begin to offer me. That being those Trios Titles, how would three random ladies have them? It'd be absurd, they didn't beat The Everyday Heroes. The Outliers and I, however, We're going to do that.
Waitress: I know where I know you from now! Your El Matto Acido!
Matador: Well, It's El Matador now, but yeah.
The waitress slaps Matador across the face, and then hugs him. It was a mix of I hate you, and I love you all in about ten seconds. TPK, and Matador glance at one another, and then to her, then back to one another again, the whole situation being very odd.
Waitress: I hate that you jumped your opponents, but I love that you won. You see, my husband places money on these matches from time to time. He happened to have large bet on your last match...he won.
TPK: Damn, I do love crazy chicks. Senorita, It's too bad we're both married. Because if I were single, I'd seriously try to take a run at you...DAMN!
Matador: Yeah, but you won't. Wouldn't wanna piss Pressila off, she gets a little hot headed.
TPK: Oh boy, tell me about it.
Matador: By the way can we smoke in here?
Waitress: Si, est no problemo.
Matador pulls out a joint, and sparks it up causing the waitress and TPK to just stare at him. Matador seems oblivious to the whole situation, and when he finally does become aware at the eyes locked on him he shrugs.
Matador: What, I was going to let ya'll into the circle. You don't think I am smoking this whole thing. Ma'am how do ya'll do it down here in Mexico Clockwise...or counter clockwise?
Waitress: Umm...I...I don't...clockwise, fuck it I want to hit that shit.
Matador: THAT'S THE SPIRIT! Careful though, this is some pretty strong shit.
Matador hands the waitress the joint, and without missing a beat she takes a good hard drag. She inhales, and has a bit of a coughing fit, before attempting to pass to TPK who simply refuses, prompting her to pass back to Matador who happily obliges.
EoT
El Matador: Waiting, going to get a bit of last minute training in with Schmidt.
TPK: Wait, you don't mean....hahaha you actually went and bought a bull? That's freakin' awesome!
El Matador: Yeah, he's been hanging with Grin and I in Portland for the last week or so. He's mellowed out a bit, could be he's high as fuck ninety percent of the time but hey....who knows, maybe he just likes me.
A moment or so later, a large black and white spotted bull can be seen, being lead towards the enclosure. Schmidt kicks, and scrapes, tossing his head from side to side in an act of resilience. One of the handlers catches the top of Schmidt's head to the bridge of his nose, knocking him unconscious. Matador approaches, and motions for the ring, Schmidt simply nods, and walks in unassisted.
TPK: Well, he certainly seems to have no problems listening to you, which is odd. Totally thought bulls hated matadors.
El Matador: Probably because I'm not constantly riding, or stabbing at him with sharp objects. We hang out, watch Netflix, smoke weed, eat food, and generally chill. What the hell isn't to like?
TPK: Yeah, about that. Been meaning to mention this, but The Outliers seem to be rubbing off on you. NOT that I'm complaining. Think it's pretty kick ass you've got friends.
El Matador: They are pretty awesome fellas, I love hanging with them. Also fun as hell being in a ring with them, even though it's only happened just the once. Hell, things go well this time, you're looking at one third of the Trios Champions. Imagine the surprise that'd befall GoL if that happened.
Matador enters the circle, and closes the door behind him. Schmidt simply stares him down. Jokingly, Matador stamps his feet, and lowers his head, causing Schmidt to mirror his actions. The two charge headlong towards one another, and just as it seems as The Dude is about to have one hell of a headache, they both stop, and Matador simply pats his head, and pulls an apple out of his pocket. Matador feeds the snack to his literal beast of a friend, and chuckles slightly. The duo train for hours, and once darkness falls, Matt decides to call it a day.
Matador: Now Schmidt, be a good dude, listen to these two. They just want to escort you back to your pen. I'll see you at the show, dude.
TPK had already left at this point, and it wasn't a bad night out, so Matador decided to make the short trek back to the city. About half way a fancy red car comes from seemingly nowhere. Inside are three of the most beautiful women you'd ever laid eyes on. The car sounds it's horn, getting Matador's attention.
Matador: Can I help you ladies?
Driver: Actually, we wanted to help you. It's getting late. why don't you hop in? We could go to the city...just the three of us. I'm "sure" we could find something to occupy us for the evening.
Passenger 1: Yeah, what do you say handsome? We're very lonely, please get in.
Passenger 2: We've got sushi in here, I hope you don't mind it's from a dirty old truck stop. Only problem is...we don't have anyone to share it with. Why, what ever will we do?
The driver strokes the blood red interior of the car, and motions her head ever so slightly towards the passenger side seat suggestively. Matador cocks an eyebrow under his mask, this whole situation seemed bizarre even by his standards. Generally he'd get in, no questions asked, but something deep inside of him screamed walk away.
Matador: Yeah, think I'm going to pass. Thanks, but I'm almost to my room. You senoritas have a good evening, besides my wife would kill us all if anything happened.
The driver starts to speak again, but Matador simply walks away into the distance. The next morning, Space Case is sitting down to breakfast with TPK. He recaps the events of the evening, and a loud crashing noise is heard. The waitress, a frightened look on her face, had dropped a giant plate of Juevos Rancheros. The woman rushes toward the table.
Waitress: Y...you saw el carro de las brujas!? You are a very lucky man, senior. Had you gotten in that car, they would be finding your body days later, drained of blood, symbols carved into your flesh. They say, that the temptation is so great, no man can refuse...but you refused. They are supposed to know your desires, and use them to entice you.
Matador: Thing of it is, I've got damn near anything I could want already. Though I did think it was odd, them offering me sushi...hell of a thing to find in Mexico. But, they certainly tried. Only thing I want right now, they couldn't even begin to offer me. That being those Trios Titles, how would three random ladies have them? It'd be absurd, they didn't beat The Everyday Heroes. The Outliers and I, however, We're going to do that.
Waitress: I know where I know you from now! Your El Matto Acido!
Matador: Well, It's El Matador now, but yeah.
The waitress slaps Matador across the face, and then hugs him. It was a mix of I hate you, and I love you all in about ten seconds. TPK, and Matador glance at one another, and then to her, then back to one another again, the whole situation being very odd.
Waitress: I hate that you jumped your opponents, but I love that you won. You see, my husband places money on these matches from time to time. He happened to have large bet on your last match...he won.
TPK: Damn, I do love crazy chicks. Senorita, It's too bad we're both married. Because if I were single, I'd seriously try to take a run at you...DAMN!
Matador: Yeah, but you won't. Wouldn't wanna piss Pressila off, she gets a little hot headed.
TPK: Oh boy, tell me about it.
Matador: By the way can we smoke in here?
Waitress: Si, est no problemo.
Matador pulls out a joint, and sparks it up causing the waitress and TPK to just stare at him. Matador seems oblivious to the whole situation, and when he finally does become aware at the eyes locked on him he shrugs.
Matador: What, I was going to let ya'll into the circle. You don't think I am smoking this whole thing. Ma'am how do ya'll do it down here in Mexico Clockwise...or counter clockwise?
Waitress: Umm...I...I don't...clockwise, fuck it I want to hit that shit.
Matador: THAT'S THE SPIRIT! Careful though, this is some pretty strong shit.
Matador hands the waitress the joint, and without missing a beat she takes a good hard drag. She inhales, and has a bit of a coughing fit, before attempting to pass to TPK who simply refuses, prompting her to pass back to Matador who happily obliges.
EoT