Post by Senior Awesomeo on Jul 28, 2016 1:44:32 GMT
Alyssa Devine: "Kurt should be around here somewhere."
[So I got Zoe Chaos and Nirvana......who I think is checking out my ass......here to meet up with Kurt at his gym in Chicago Illinois. The three are going to be in a Mexican Asylum Match for the GOL Trios Titles so they need some practice since the three of them have never teamed up together. I mean I've seen them drink, throw darts at a transvestite bathroom at a gay bar, and even went streaking at a horse track once in Kentucky. But this is an actual match where one wrong move and someone's career can end. But they are blood related so hopefully they can work well together.]
Nirvana: "Nice little gym you guys got set up here."
Alyssa Devine: "Yeah, we have a little bit of everything here. We have so many rooms around here though, hard to find him if you ever need to get to him."
Zoe Chaos: "You ever try shouting out I've got Taco Bell?"
Alyssa Devine: "It used to work all the time but then he finally got wise when I never had any with me."
Nirvana: "Well we'll find him. Where does he usually hang out."
Alyssa Devine: " Usually in the bathroom or in the film room. Already checked in the bathroom so he must be in the film room. Hopefully he's not watching porn again in there. Last time I walked on him jerking off, it was a BDSM of Granny Porn. I couldn't look Kurt in his eyes for a week after that experience."
Nirvana: "Yeah, he's my son."
Zoe Chaos: "Eeewww."
[Walking up to the film room, I quickly turn the knob and open the door.]
Alyssa Devine: "Kurt are youOHMYGOD!"
[My eyes folks.....my eyes are burning. As soon as I opened up that door I find Kurt masturbating. Not to just any type of porn......but to pictures of.......of......of Zoe Chaos. Kurt, startled and confused, quickly turns to panic as he fumbles around to hide his......well he likes to call it Kurt Jr.......I just call it his penis. Wondering what the hell is going on, Zoe and and Nirvana fling the door open to find Kurt with his pants down and his Kurt Jr. out.]
[Well Zoe, she starts freaking out with her mouth open and a shocked look on her face as she's lost for words with what's on the computer screen. Nirvana on the other hand just looks confused as he looks at Kurt. The confusion soon goes to a smile as he looks down at Kurt Jr.]
Nirvana: "Ha! You are my son! Look at the size of that pickle! It's huge just like mine!"
Zoe Chaos: "What is wrong with the two of you! He's jerking off to pictures of me!"
Nirvana: "Well can you blame him? I'd jerk off to you to if we weren't related."
Zoe Chaos: "But Kurt and I are related!"
Nirvana: "Oh yeah."
[Kurt quickly grabs his wrestling mask from a nearby table and tries to put it on. With a bad Mexican accent, Kurt tries to diffuse the situation at hand.]
Senior Awesomeo: "I'm not Kurt! I'm Senior Awesomeo! Senior Awesomeo! No Kurt here."
Zoe Chaos: "You are a sick fucker Kurt."
[Holding her head, Zoe walks off to probably drink an entire bottle of Jack to try to forget what just happened. That or beat the shit out of someone. What ever she's about to do she needs a friend. So Kurt, you can finish this narrator duty you sick bastard.]
.....................
(But I'm Senior Awesome! I'm not Kurt.....I'm Senior......ah fuck it. Nothing I can do now but finish up here and.......wait......that would be fucked up. Don't even ask why I was even jerking off to pictures of Zoe. I was on the Internet looking up how to microwave a hamster.....seriously don't ask.....and one thing led to another and I fell into the rabbit hole that is internet porn. I mean there is everything when it comes to porn. I found one of a hentai cartoon of myself and Benny Stevens doing each other. Did I jerk off to that?
Maybe.
I mean the two of us look alike and it's pretty much like masterbating to myself.......which isn't gay right? You know what, I'm rambling. So I'm just going to continue this already horrible promo.)
(Looking over, I find Nirvana still looking at me with that grin on his face. Looking over his shoulders, Nirvana softly whispers to me.)
Nirvana: "You think you can forward those pics for me? You know.......for scientific research and all."
Senior Awesomeo: "............suuuure pop."
Nirvana: "Thanks bud."
(The smile soon disappears as he begins to shout at me, loud enough so that anyone near can hear him.)
Nirvana: "WHAT THE HELL KURT! That's family your masterbating to. You should be ashamed of yourself."
(Giving me that grin again, he winks at me before walking off to probably find Alyssa and Zoe. So here I am, alone with my Kurt Jr. out with half naked pics of Zoe Chaos on my computer screen. Well..........I guess now is the perfect time to do a promo. So with the Senior Awesome mask half way on my face, I give off a smile as I start the promo.)
Senior Awesome: "Hey there friendos! Senior Awesomeo here! Eternal Lucha is just around the corner and Nirvana, Zoe Chaos, and myself are willing and ready for this Trios Tag Team match for the GOL Trios Titles. You know, I've been looking forward to this match for a month now because this is going to be the first time that I'd be teaming up with my Dad Nirvana and my niece Zoe Chaos. Finally. This family will get to team up with one another and show the rest of the wrestling world that we are the true family of wrestling and that when we're together, we are unstoppable.
Now The Glitterati, The Everyday Heros, and the House of Serena.......I'm sure each and everyone of you think you're going to walk into this match thinking that you're going to win this. You might think you're top shit with what ever fed that you're apart of and that because you've dominated that fed you think you can just walk into GOL and win the Trios Titles. Well sorry to bust your bubble but that ain't going to happen because when I look at the Glitterati, Everyday Heros, and especially the House Of Serena......I don't see professional wrestlers, I see a bunch of gimmick wrestlers and cosplay nerds posing to be wrestlers.
You are looking at a true wrestling dynasty with the living legend himself Nirvana, the man that has done it all and invented and has been the first in numerous type of special stimulation matches. Then you have myself, a twenty year veteran that has wrestled from one corner of the world to the other side. I'm a dude that has won numerous titles in numerous wrestling organizations and GOLs current number one contender for the Rey De Reyes belt. And finally you have Zoe Chaos."
(Forgetting that I still have Zoe's half naked pictures on my computer screen, I reach out with my hand and fumble with the mouse to quickly delete the pictures on the screen. All while still looking at the camera.)
Kurt Newman: "A young up and comer who, with the right and training and guidance with Nirvana and myself, can and will be a one of the greats in the wrestling industry. So yeah......none of you other teams stand a chance. And add the fact that this match is going to be a Mexican Asylum Match......this goes in our favor even more since Nirvana is a hardcore legend, I'm into Hardcore porn, and Zoe's last name is a hardcore type of name. So we're just a hardcore family that's ready to hurt some people with what ever objects we can get our dirty fingers on."
(Slowly standing up, I realize that my pants are still around my ankles. Quickly pulling my pants up, I give a bad grin as I finish up the promo.)
Kurt Newman: "Ladies and gentlemen of this Trios Title match.......we are The Triad. And we will be walking out of Eternal Lucha with the Trios Tag Team Titles. I'd wish you all luck......but everyone knows that I'm fucking Lady Luck, and she's been liking what she's been getting lately."
(With that, I wink at the camera before walking off set. The camera quickly looks at the computer screen to see that Zoe's pictures are off the screen.........but instead it's hentai pictures of myself and Benny Stevens kissing andhollyshit I need to take that off.)
End Scene